Finding a Babysitter for Free (or at least for less than usual)

Paying a babysitter to watch your two kids so you can have a night out can be really expensive.  Finding a babysitter competent enough to watch your five kids so you can go out can be impossible  So, chances are you'll just have to wait another ten years until your kids are old enough to watch themselves.  Sorry.

Just kidding!

Of course you need to go out.  Of course you need a little grown up time away from your kids every now and then.  Unfortunately the more kids you have, the more breaks you'll need, and the more impossible it will seem to find a sitter.  But don't give up.  It can be done, and quite often for free.

The first thing you need to do is find someone who has as many kids as you.  (We've said it before, and we'll say it again: having friends who are in the same situation as you will be a huge blessing in your life!)

The Swap

If you have friends who are in the same babysitting boat as you, they'll be more likely (and more desperate) to help you out.  Your friends are probably just as desperate as you are for a night out, so take turns!  You take their kids one Friday night, and they take yours the next.  Yes, that means there may be eight kids under six years old at your house for the evening.  Yes, it may be totally crazy.  But you can handle it.  And it may not even be as crazy as you think.  You know as well as we do that if you already have four kids, adding another four or five isn't nearly as stressful as it would have been when you only had one or two.  And the next weekend you will be kid free!  Isn't that worth it? 

M: In ten years of having small children (before they got old enough to start watching themselves) my husband and I paid for babysitting a total of three times.  Only three!  We went out a lot, but we were able to find someone to swap with nearly every time.



If you need someone to babysit in your own home (perhaps so your kids can be put to sleep in their own beds), your best option is still to look to other big families for help.

The First Born
The average fourteen year old is not at all prepared to watch all four of your rowdy little ones for the night.  But the fourteen year old who is the oldest of six kids is not average.  The oldest children in big families have had a lifetime of experience dealing with kids and will probably find watching your little ones a breeze compared to the hours they've spent watching their own siblings.

If you're still nervous about leaving your kids in the hand of teenagers, the other great thing about children from large families is they are likely to have a babysitting buddy (i.e. younger sister) they can bring with them to share the work load.

The Younger Neighbor

Another under-utilized option is a younger neighbor kid who you haven't considered because she just seems too young to be able to handle everyone.  This person is probably too young to have much experience (she she doesn't charge much), too young to have a lot of babysitting jobs already (so she's available when you want her!), but she lives nearby and you and her mother are friends.

That final point is the most important.  This is how it goes: you put all your kids down, maybe even a little bit on the early side, and then leave!  The younger babysitter you hired just sits in your family room and watches a movie, or does some homework in a very quiet house.  She's there to get your kids out if there's a housefire, or to get someone a drink if they get out of bed, but otherwise they may not even know she's there.  And in the unlikely event that something goes wrong (a toddler with a bad dream?), her mother is just down the street, ready to come help her daughter out.



K: We had a neighbor girl who lived just across the street who did this for us many times.  She loved to get out of the house and have some peace and quiet, and I think only one time one of our kids got up because they had to go to the bathroom, so she took them.  Other than that, they never even saw her.  And the best part?  Because she's putting in almost no effort, she charged very little (think $5-$10 for the whole night, even with three or four little ones).

So don't give up!  You can do it!  You can get out of your house!  Just keep looking.  The perfect sitter for you is out there somewhere.  And one day soon your kids will be old enough to watch themselves and you will be giddy with your newfound freedom.



Good luck!


Marcia and Kate