Picture Day

When my oldest daughter started kindergarten, picture day was a BIG deal. This was the moment that was going to capture all the magical hopes and dreams of her first year of public education. My daughter and I spent several days talking about what she could wear, what she should wear.  My husband and I spent many evenings discussing what was the best hairstyle of the occasion.  I thought her bangs were so cute, but he liked them pulled back so he could see her face better. We both agreed she does look best in pigtails though.  The decisions that had to be made weighed heavy on me that week.

 

When picture day arrived, we spent an hour in the bathroom curling her hair. Her clothes were just right. I coached her on how to adjust her collar and check her hair at school.  I told her to be careful at recess so she didn't mess herself up. I cursed the wind as I dropped her off at school that morning, hoping it wouldn't blow the curls out of her hair.  And then I waited. When she came home that afternoon I inspected her appearance to gage how good she might have looked for her pictures.  I quizzed her on her day. What time did you have your picture taken? Was it before or after lunch.  How long has your sweater been unbuttoned.  Did you wear your collar up like that all day? Do you remember if your ponytail fell out before or after the picture? In the end, I concluded that her appearance was probably acceptable (and that there was nothing I could do about it if it wasn't), and we moved on with our life. 

 

Umm... did I mention we don't even buy these pictures? They are way too expensive.  I just wanted to make sure she was represented well in the year book (which we also don't buy) and looked good on her ID badge.  At least the ID badge we get to keep (as that eternal memento of all the magical hopes and dreams of her first year of public education, remember?).   *sigh*

 

Since then things have changed. There have been more years than I can count, that my kids have come home from school wearing a ratty tee shirt and said, Did you know it was picture day today? Nope, didn't know that.  Oh well.

 

Today is picture day for my elementary kids. We thought it was last week, so my excited little boys decided on their own to wear their Sunday clothes to school so they would look extra good in the picture.  To say the were disappointed about dressing up and not getting their picture taken would be an understatement. I assured them that they could dress up again on the real picture day, and everything would be fine. I gave no further thought to picture day or how it would or would not affect my life.  I had no plan for what they should wear.  I just hoped they at least combed their hair that day.  

Then something happened last night that enlightened my tired mommy brain.  My kindergartner was praying before bed and he said, "Please bless us to look cute for our pictures tomorrow." That's when it hit me.  I may have sent kids off to school on picture day a dozen times before, but this was still his first time.  And it was a big deal to him. He was excited. He was worried. He was unsure. He wanted to look his best and do things right.  With this new realization in mind, I asked my husband to be sure and give him a bath in the morning, make sure his hair gets combed, and help him find a shirt with a collar.  And now I just have to sit back and wait, and hope my baby survives this big-boy milestone with all his little feelings still intact.

 

So what's the lesson here? I have a lot of kids, it's easy to forget that even though it's not my first time, it's still their first time. And that may mean that they are feeling a lot of the excitement, fear, and confusion that I already went through and got over years ago. So I'm doing my best to take a step back and try to put myself in that new mom mindset so I can enjoy the moment with my child. Not only does he need me to slow down and allow him to experience the full emotion of these moments, but he needs me to be there with him. 

 

Marcia