Dear Elementary School Mom

I just wanted to let you know I saw you last night.  We were both at the elementary school for "Monster Math Night" which you now realize is just the semi-educational version of a giant Halloween party.  You don't know me yet, but I know you.  You are Me ten years ago.  Has it really been that long?  I recognized you by the infant you had strapped to your front, the toddler you had buckled into the stroller, and the kindergartner who held your hand and drug you to every single booth in the entire building.  And of course I recognized you by the confused, exhausted, and forced smile you were wearing.  I use to own that same smile. Fortunately I've outgrown it.

I saw you pushing your stroller with Herculean force through a crowd of hundreds of parents and children.  I saw you smile when your kindergartner proudly showed you how he could count the teeth on a monster puppet.  I saw you  give the evil eye to that pushy fifth-grader when he tried to cut in line in front of your child at the ring toss.

I heard you humming to your baby, hoping she would stay asleep for just a little while longer while you pushed through the mob to the next fun activity.  I heard you plead with your five-year-old to be happy going home early so that your toddler could get to bed before they had a total melt-down.

I know you questioned your parenting when you let your two-year-old eat their third candy bar of the night. I know you didn't recognize at least half of the teachers and administrators who greeted you and your child by name tonight.

I felt you die a little inside when you walked into the gym and realized there were a dozen more quasi-educational activity booths that your precious child (and future Einstein) had not yet participated in.  I felt you wrestling with the question of How important is this activity really?


I know you saw me too.  You just didn't recognize me. I'm You in ten years.  My hair is combed.  There are no boogers on my shirt.  I don't have a baby strapped to my front or a stroller with a restless toddler.  And best of all, I have slept.  Really slept.  All night!  Eight hours in a row!

We still have a lot in common though.

We love our children, and we both spend every day wondering what we can do better for them.
We both have more to do than we will ever get done, although I'm learning to prioritize better.
Neither of us likes "Monster Math Night," but we both still go anyway (although I confess last year I bribed my son with a bag of candy if he would just be happy staying home and playing UNO with his brother).

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I saw you.  I REALLY saw YOU.  And you're doing okay.  In fact, you're doing better than okay.  You're doing great.  And things will get easier (probably not soon, sorry, but eventually).  So hang in there.  Keep that toddler strapped into the stroller as long as you can, keep pushing through those crowds, keep doing what you're doing, because you're doing great.  And for good or for bad, it will be over before you know it.


Love,

YOU, ten years from now  (you'll make it! and so will the kids.)